She

If you ever read this

this shit is what she wanted to say so far

She tried to heal the wounds that he made

Alone

She also tried to love again

but then she realized

there's no other

there's no way to escape the feeling

She knew 

how much he broke her heart

how many pieces she gotta pick

how sick he tore her heart

how far he went away

yet, she stays

She tried to keep herself in silence

avoids every possible conversation she might get with him

because his voice is her favorite tune

more than every song she could ever love

she's tired of building up the wall in front of him

she's that damn tired

of running

of hiding

of feeling down

she's that damn tired

And the laughter

She laughs hard

no, she didn't fake it, she never did

if you ever listen to them 

carefully

there's something deep inside her heart

pain, wound, scar, whatever it is

that she hopes, they may be healed by the laughter

She tries hard on giving herself 

assumption and suggestion

at night when she want to off to bed

at dawn when the first time she opens her eyes

that everything will be alright

that everything will be fine

(that maybe he will be coming back around)

She also avoids every eyes contacts to him

because she knew

looking into his eyes will bring back 

those sweet short memories

Now she's wondering

"why does every love song seem to be made for me?"

"Am I there? In your prayer? Cause you're on mine"

"Hey! Who the hell I am for thinking on this shit?"

Deep inside

She needs

She hopes

She prays